Puja Sachdev | August 2, 2023 | Divorce
Grief is the series of emotions that comes with loss. When a person experiences a loss of some kind, it is typically accompanied by grief. While many associate grief with the death of a loved one, it is also commonly felt during the divorce process.
This is because divorce represents an end and a loss. Both men and women can go through their own grieving processes as they proceed with formally ending their marriage — and an important chapter of their lives.
The 7 Stages of Grief Men Experience During and After Divorce
Women are often said to be more emotional than men. This leads many to believe that men are incapable of experiencing strong emotions. However, that is simply untrue. Especially during challenging times, such as divorce — particularly in cases where the husband was opposed to the separation — men can feel an extremely potent sense of loss.
It is important to remember that everyone experiences grief differently. However, the following are the common stages of grief men may experience during and after their divorce.
Shock and Denial
Depending on the circumstances, the thought of an impending divorce can be shocking. Additionally, you may go into denial, attempting to suppress the feelings that may arise and avoid facing the reality of the situation.
Pain and Guilt
After reality has set in, you need to start preparing for what’s to come. This can be a painful time as you start thinking about the divorce process and what your future will look like. You may also feel a sense of guilt during this period, especially if you know or think your actions contributed to the end of your marriage.
Anger and Bargaining
It’s normal for your feelings to transition from hurt to anger. You may feel frustrated and betrayed, and your emotions may cause you to do things you otherwise wouldn’t, like lash out at your spouse, children, or other blameless individuals.
Along with anger, you may also feel the need to bargain with your spouse. This could include promising to be a better husband if they call off the divorce, as well as making other offers — all in an effort to try to keep your marriage together. And if your bargaining doesn’t go as planned, it could further contribute to your feelings of anger.
Depression and Loneliness
After you’ve ridden the wave of anger for some time, you’ll likely come back down into sadness. The strong feelings of depression and loneliness are often the hardest to overcome. Certain consequences of your divorce, like having to spend time away from your children, could contribute to these emotions.
This is the point where the severity of the situation really hits. You’re losing your marriage and dealing with the unpleasantness of divorce, from splitting property to creating a child custody arrangement. At this stage, you may need to reach out for help and ensure you have a strong support group, including friends, family, and a therapist.
An Upward Turn
Eventually, your depression will lessen, and you’ll start to feel better about your situation. While you may still have some tough days here and there, you’ll take a turn toward better days and look forward rather than backward.
Working and Rebuilding
Post-divorce life takes some rebuilding and restructuring. You’re going from married to single life, which looks different for everyone. During this stage, you’ll start moving on, organizing your new life, and setting goals for yourself.
Acceptance and Hope
Once you reach the finish line, you’ll likely feel a sense of stability and hope for the future. You’ll accept what happened, understand why it had to happen that way, and put away the negative feelings you once felt. Healing doesn’t happen overnight, but as the saying goes, “time heals all.”
Getting Help With Your Divorce in San Diego, CA
Divorce is difficult, but having the right legal representation can help make the process less challenging. If you’re facing a divorce, do not hesitate to consult a local divorce attorney for guidance and support.
Contact Our Divorce Law Firm in San Diego, CA
Sachdev Legal Group, APC
2851 Camino del Rio S #430
San Diego, CA 92108